That Joke Isn't Funny Anymore

mercy_divided @ 2007-02-20T19:29:00

2007-02-20T08:37:20Z

Wow. I haven't used this LJ for THAT long
Clealy, <15 minutes before dinner isn't time for a large, long update. So.

I am slowly trying to find my 'style' ie wear the nice clothes I never have places to wear down to the shops to buy fruit & bread, because I can. (previously it would just be trackies)

I am slowly trying to get a job. I need the money; spending $5 on magazines & sprite zero & boost chocolate bars & t-shirts to wear under-dresses and random items of clothing is beginning to leave a serious hole in my wallet.

I got into my 'Legal and Dispute Studies' course at RMIT & I had my first morning of Orientation today. It was alright; I found it & remembered it was just on the corner. After about 11:30 I finished & mucked around in the city, looking at shops they weren't chain stores, exploring the city, getting blisters on my feet.

I met up with Emma & Kat today at around 3. It was perfect weather & nice chats. My feet were aching so I wasn't as relaxed as I could be. I ended up running into Sophie, an old friend from kinder & primary school; I swear I haven't seen that girl in years; new hair & all grown up. I like suddenly being older & running into people you haven't seen; and how it's actually interesting to hear what people are doing and soforth

I hate my parents & I think I will eat dinner in my room. I can't look them in the eye. They just don't understand that when something is fucked up, its fucked up.
xx

mercy_divided @ 2006-12-21T20:57:00

2006-12-21T10:57:03Z

You know, I really want peanut butter right now.
I think that I'd actually allow myself to eat it with a spoon (for the 2nd time, ever eaten 375g of peanut butter in one afternoon? Nut, didn't think so...believe me, it's not worth the sickness)
but um, i want it
and we don't have any
My eyes are sore
I need to shave my underarms
Fuck.

mercy_divided @ 2006-10-06T17:46:00

2006-10-06T07:59:22Z

my birthday is tomorrow
i am dreading it now.
mum expects me to spend the whole day helping her
it's my 18th I protested, I have work to do and things that are important that I need to do as well.
She cracked it & hit me & pushed threw me into the wall. She took my stereo out of my room to 'test it' and moved my cds like it didn't matter, and it does.
She's an absolute bitch to me. Tells me I should have done the music cd earlier, and not 'the night before' but i'm sorry, studying for a history sac & 2 practice exams which are before saturday come beforehand. She doesn't give a flying fuck about me having a good day & that's what's more important to me. Thinking I am self-centered because she changes EVERYTHING and because I have priorities before Saturday. Says Dad & I do nothing and that I don't do anything for the party. Hello, I suggested everything, I wrote down what we needed; and she goes and gets shit that's different anyway (ie, I asked for snake lollies not fucking milkbottles, nobody likes fucking milkbottles.) I know what the parties I go to are like, because I'm the one that fucking goes to them, not her. Stupid cow can fucking rot in hell. Then she refuses to buy bread & cereal & babybels & iced coffee up&go's because there isn't enough room in the fridge/cupboard. I don't even get a dinner on my birthday, which means 'quick dinner' which means 3 people will go through more than 4 pieces of bread. This exceedingly pisses me off; I need my cereal because I go through a ton of it & because Dad eats it too at least one day a week because his runs out. She stabbed me & now I have a cut lip. YET SHE THINKS ITS FINE TO GET HER FUCKING BISCUITS. similarly, I tell her its the 'honey soy' etc chips people like, and she gets fucking lime & pepper. I can't even be in the same room as anything involving pepper. I hate her. If she wasn't such a bitch & always refused to take me driving I'd be getting my license & I could fucking drive away.

I can't stop crying because it isn't fair.
Tomorrow (Saturday) is my birthday.
At least Emma (I love you) and Kim sent me cards, and Wendy (Mum's friend/family friend, except Dad doens't like her much) sent me a present the other day to open tomorrow.
♥ Liz

I am no longer excited about

mercy_divided @ 2006-09-29T20:38:00

2006-09-29T10:49:41Z

I honestly don't know the last time I updated this thing; this has become the journal I log into at school when I can't use my private (and therefore half-active, ha, compared to this 'not active' one) LJ because it'll save on the history files. Gah.

Basically. I have school. Wednesday, Thursday and today consisted of five practice exams at school ON THE HOLIDAYS which haven't really been the holidays. Last week was 'study' which really meant procrastinating & getting trashy magazines bought for me because 'you deserve a break' when I didn't really: my 'study' consisted of putting things in piles on the floor. I haven't done as much study as Ive planned to know & I could have, and I need school because being surronded by the hype will get me going. The first week was full of shit I had to do though: echo that I have once every 2 years, see my GP because I needed a prescription. Gah, I really don't like Marie much anymore. I used to see her regularly & now I don't & she just wants to chat and it's like, while she is genuine it's too genuine and it pisses me off. I made up I had to be somewhere at 12 just so I could get out of talking to her for 20 minutes.

Isn't it sad I have not too much to tell? On Sunday night I have Julia's, tomorrow I plan to walk Murphy at 6-7, get my eyebrows waxed at 9 & then Mum and I are going to st.kilda to try and find me an outfit for my 18th. Which is one week tomorrow...I'm not really excited because being 18 will change absolutley nothing at least until year 12 is over: I can't really afford to go out & get drunk, I don't really have many invites & opportunities to do that anyway, and it's a fair way off before I get my license too SO that's that then.

However I have been exceptionally good lately at one thing. For two days - or mornings you could say. Awake at 6 most mornings away, the fact it was light... I walked Murphy at 6:28AM this morning & 6:47am yesterday morning. My aim is to leave at 6:15 - when school goes back, even though if it is only for 2.5 weeks, I want to go in the mornings so I can focus on work after school. If I'm up in the morning & it's light I don't really have an excuse not too, and it's actually quite nice once I'm out there. Once you've got the willpower to walk out the door it is all good. I'm going tomorrow morning & must remain determined!

Goodnight lovelies!

mercy_divided @ 2006-09-12T08:11:00

2006-09-11T22:20:26Z

Hello all, I am a) writing (!) and b) writing in the non private journal (!!)
Sadly, there is not much for me to elaborate other than my soon-to-be 18th, the invitations which are getting printed tomorrow, the fact I'm listening to Pearl jam on my iPod, I have 2 more sacs left ever, my hands are cold... it's house festival today so year 12's have 2, instead of 5 (though most have 4 + 1 spare) classes. Oh, not to mention the serious amount of homework. Or should I say 'study.' My desk was cleaned yesterday & is a reminder of the things I need to organise:
-Party
-Give/decide on a quote for the log
-Give first day of school photo to Babz
-Dentist appointment
-Appointment with Marie
-Fix morning w/ Mum to get trumpet fixed (valves are fucked)
-Echo

Hence, the first week of my holidays, for at least 1/2 the day is ruined in terms of study due to the errands I need to run. The last week of holidays (Wednesday, thursday, friday) is practice exams & Also a day of birthday shopping. Alcohol, cd's (I plan a $150 binge on cd's on my birthday, hence I have not bought any cd's since June 12. Let's not forget a) something to wear on my 18th & I'll have to decide on what colour 'samsonite suitcase' that I want. Suggestions? And I might be getting sunglasses. The day after my birthday there are 3 things on, 2/3 I don't want to go to, however to get out of one I'm saying I'll go to another: Go to the History Lecture to get out of the Music rehearsel & go to the Firbank fete in the morning. I don't plan on being a fit state to do any work, so doing a lecture where I simply have to listen but am still 'working' seems the right option.

So, basically, my life consists of getting to school at 7:35, making a cup of tea, doing work/coming on the internet, school, come home, walk dog, do work + dinner + shower till about 10, ten read & write in my written diary & go to bed. Oh, and I'm getting hayfever & a sore throat & I am proud that I can actually go to a party & not drink any alcohol. Was worth it not to have a groggy next day.

♥ Liz

mercy_divided @ 2006-08-30T08:07:00

2006-08-29T22:18:40Z

The second morning in the row I've read livejournals! 8:07am, can't be bothered to read my Acounting Chapter & figure I can do this in legal anyway. It is very exciting for me to be heer, my hands are very cold, but not purple; which is odd because it is supposed to be (god forbid) 21 & 22 in the next two days. I may even walk Murphy in a TSHIRT!

Ha so I have 5 SAC's left; 2 Legal, 1 History, 1 Accounting, 1 Maths. really not understanding fucking Probability (Maths) at the moment, which is pissing me off because I understand the theory but can't actually get the right answers. How funny. The last English essay on 'The Quiet American' which was quite bad? I wrote only 2 1/3 pages, simply because I had no other ideas, although technically it is within the word limit, and perhaps a better essay than usual, due to my use of quotes and varying words I don't often use, except my argument was shit. Ah well. I think I'll do Oedipus and Minimum of Two for the exam; because questions on the Quiet American are very foggy. I've got myself out of Fridays day lunch (or is it dinner? i think its dinner) because I need to word, and seeing as David always gets out of family events for no reason, and I don't but I HAVE reason (ie Maths SAC next week, even though it will be put back even further) and I don't fancy getting home at 10:30 on Sunday night.

It's kind of hard when i know there are things coming up, but I'm going to try and not drink any alcohol till my 18th. Which is in 39 days... HA I can't wait to walk into a bottle shop legally. How interesting. I'll actually be quite dissappointing if I don't get relatively drunk. Hmm. Mainly because I want to be able to be productive on Sundays & not be completley asleep.

In other news, I want to start getting fitter, because I've been quite good at walking Murphy and it's becoming perhaps a little easy for me; so I need to 'up the ante.' Currently my exercise consists of: walking to & from the train station (10 mins) + about 5 mins to & from train to school 4 days a week, a 35 minute 'power walk' every day, and um, as lame as it sounds... I frequently dance around in my room to the likes of The Faint, Death From Above 1979 disco versions and 'Ain't No other Man' by Christina Aguilera. And 'Blow Your Whistle' et etc... oh, and the trumpet is the 2nd most strenuos instrument, even though I only play it about once a week.

Anyway, time for me to be off. Sorry about this dull entry.

mercy_divided @ 2006-08-20T13:37:00

2006-08-20T03:55:19Z

I'm probably the most sober & with it than I ever have been after a night out, which doesn't make sense
Thankyou Clancy for your wonderful hospitality; and hmm... I need to get my hands on people's phones/cameras.
I had my first minor experience with salt, tequila and lemon, and there is a recording of it on Alex's phone
Personally, this was very amusing, as Irene & Alex are particulairly determined to see me properly drunk, which never really works, because I get midly gasey in the stomach from volume of liquid, then I wee a lot, or in the case of champagne, feel light-headed and sit in a corner being antisocial, so the prospect of getting 'drunk' doesn't happen.
I would love to work in a bottle shop.
I've realised it would be absolutley hysterical looking at every newly 18 yr old buying tequila & what not, smirking - because the purpose of those drinks is primarily to make an idiot of yourself. Ah well, shit happens.
According to my mother, I smelt of grog although I would've only had about 3 standard drinks. Yet I was sober when I got picked up, and I wokt up at 6am without trying. My eyes aren't even sore, like I sometimes get from little sleep. Mum got pissed at me for only sleeping 5.25 hours - WHY DOESNT SHE FUCKING GET IT I simply am incapable of sleeping till past 9am. No doubt I will fall asleep at about 9:30pm (extremely early) because afternoon naps that are forced don't walk.

Contemplating going for my walk (I feel obliged now, I will make it 7 days a week for the first time this year! Oh, and not to let down Leyla)
My English essay I wrote this morning is, I am certain, the worst essay I have ever written. But whatever. I shall go for a walk & do type up the final chapter of Legal textbook for my Adversay System notes. Then watch Futurama.

mercy_divided @ 2006-08-16T07:48:00

2006-08-15T21:53:28Z

1.Minor update for no apperant reason
2.Last night twas' the Concerto Concerto where I discovered I like string music with piano solos
3.I have my History SAC tomorrow & Friday.
4.I have to carry my trumpet home tonight, for the 8th last time this year
5.If it isn't 'free' to print on the study room printer, and I've just printed 9 pages of legal notes, I WILL cry
6. I'm actually starting to care about how I go at the end of the year, now I actually have a specific course I'd like, and the alternative option is TAFE
7. It's 53 days till my 18th, 3 years & 3 weeks since I've had potato or hot chips & there's only 30 something actual school days left
8. I HAVE to remember to take lunch leave & be back in time for my SAC on Friday so I can put money in the bank... last time I'll get bonus interest

Okay, so now I need to shit and play around with some notes/start writing 2 letters

xx Liz

mercy_divided @ 2006-08-12T17:52:00

2006-08-12T08:02:17Z

Well, it HAS been a long stretch since I've written in this thing, and about a week since I wrote in the other one. Basically, I have no life & no time for a life. I'm becoming increasingly jealous of the people who have a life revolving around Sorrento & boys & myspace and their mobile phone - yet at least half of these people get better grades than me, and basically have much more time having 'fun.' My Saturday revolved around being woken up at 6:30 (Dad), getting up at 6:55, having cereal, doing Accounting Ratios (reading the answers), taking my dog for a walk, coming home, doing more accounting + starting legal notes, then starting the dreaded history highlighting. I've come on the internet in search of some form of timeline for History. Oh, I also mucked around with my trumpet for 15 minutes, because I'm about to have shower + dinner + head off to 'Melbourne Bands Festival' which is somewhat entertaining but I have so much work I need to do + I think either one of the Phoebe's were having people around? Oh, the idea of rocking up at 10:30pm in my Stage Band uniform (black pants, white shirt, black vest, gold tie) doesn't really appeal to me. Tomorrow is taken up by Open Days even though I haven't had time to organise when & which ones I am going to. Somehow, I have to, basically, write two essays

if you know anything regarding how the failure of the Dumas contributed to the Russian Revolution/s in 1917, or anything regarding Lenin, Trotsky or another revolutionary individual and the key role they played in the movement towards revolution in Russia, do let me know immediately

Was literally in tears today over the fact I have no time. FUCK rehearsel 1-5pm on MID TERM BREAK for fucks sake that I 'have to' go to. I am in two songs, one which Amy Knurek sings & another one. In short, I play a note, count 20 bars rest, and then play another note. Last week I wasted 1.5 hours in rehearsel watching strings play. I have priorities. Bloody Gilbert & Sullivan can fuck itself, for all I care.

Hmm. I have discovered that if I want to grow, the thing missing from my overall lifestyle is sleep. Unfortunately, as we can see, this is not an option. Despite the fact that it honestly does not occur to me to go to bed earlier than 11pm, nor does it seem odd to me to wake up at 6 am - easily - without an alarm. Hmm. Opinions?

mercy_divided @ 2006-07-28T08:02:00

2006-07-27T22:10:39Z

Yeah, so this livejournal is very nearly dead as I only really use my other one, and that one I've been trying to avoid using to. I've been successful for another 4 days running of not coming on livejournal at home, so yes, well done to me. I did 2.5 hours of homework last night! I got home at 4:20, walked Murphy, came back, worked, had a shower, worked, had dinner, worked, packed my bag for tomorrow, read my book & wrote in my diary. Oh, and I managed NOT to spill my coffee upstairs too. I feel much more satisfied on days I dont muck around & get things done.

Formal fever is beginning to hit. it's starting to bug me now about the whole travelling arrangements/arrangements in general - I can't relax and have a good time if I have to worry about that kind of thing. 10 o'clock last night:
Me: 'Are you prepared to pick me up from some random nightclub and some ungodly hour in the morning?'
Mum: Yes, darling. Don't leave your heater on all night.

It kind of annoys me, because I wish she got over the whole taxi issue. Getting a taxi doesn't phase me, as long as it is booked because it's a Saturday night. For gods sake, they need to adapt to these type of things because they are going to get a big slap in the face when they magically can't stop me when I'm 18 (parents are 'they', I am 18 in 72 days/October 7)

I'm getting my hair done at 1:30 & make-up at 3:30 and pre's are at 4:30 tomorrow. I'm not even excited. I'm wondering whether I can wear boots to the after=party. I REFUSE to wear high-heels for any longer than I have to. I'm a bit annoyed I'm not taking anyone now, I initially wanted to, then it became too hard & I wasn't going to trust some people (I trust some, but not all) to set me up with people just so because it was 'cool.' Gah. Anyway.

So yes, I thought a little update would keep everyone happy. Hopefully I may get a chance on Sunday to post, or something.

♥ Liz

mercy_divided @ 2006-07-14T12:10:00

2006-07-14T02:15:37Z

I've been reading entries in this journal the last few days at school; though there is no longer time to speak of for comments, let alone an update of my own.I guess I failed to mention that seeing Yr 12 has started again, that again I must avoid the internet at all costs?

I have 10 minutes until my next class. I have a spare & saw no point in starting anything new, so since I've come to the library I did 4 questions (finish off) for Accounting, followed by reading Vogue, and picking out library books (2 classics, actually, wouldn't Sophie & kara be proud?)

Midday yesterday Mum was in a car-accident. It was her work car (ie, the white one which varies, only the colour & Royal District Nursing Service logo are consistent) and she only had a serious amount of whiplash and shock. A car bashed into the back of her at an intersection, it was lucky that a car was also driving horizontally - as this would mean should would've been hit head on. I think the car flew about 10 metres & pieces of Mum's car were on the road. This isnt good for her already back/neck problems - last night she was too scared to get off the couch.

Other than that, neither Mum or I are dead, I still do come on livejournal everyday, and I have a shitload of work to do until mid-November. Lovely

mercy_divided @ 2006-07-10T10:21:00

2006-07-10T00:33:10Z

Ha so I never update this anymore, but I feel I should keep it alive
I'm currently relatively amused, and I shouldn't be.
It's 10:21am, Monday, my last day of the holidays and dad just got home from work. So the whole family is at home, and Murphy is sitting on the heating duct, and it's all very peachy.
Despite the fact that my Dad is sick with what he describes as 'a bit of the flu' since Thursday, he still went to Sydney (leaving home 4:30am Sunday morning) and back yesterday, now he's home after leaving for work at 7:15am. This is hysterical. He only comes home if he's dying, or if Jane & Claire have a baby or something like that. The last time I remember him being sick and home from work was in primary school.
And my health isn't fantastic since about Thursday, either. I'm sick too - I'd love to curl myself up in bed, but I can't really bring myself to, and I cant fall asleep at this hour, either. I've been gurgly/coughing, but this is say once every few hours, and comes up easily. And I have sinus in my eyes which makes me want to fall asleep.

There's been Sarah's 18th the night before last & that wasn't bad. I drank 2 glasses of champagne + a cruiser which wasn't too smart, I was extremely light headed, still wanted another cruiser but I thought my stomach might explode if I did - too much liquid in general for me. I danced, though not as much as I usually do. I talked about music with two people & became pissed off I wasn't 18 & didn't have friends with decent music taste (again) and that was about it. My outfit for the 1920's theme by no means fitted me, but I could get away with it.

Today I have to go and get my formal dress fitted. I guess it'll be soon because Mum wants to visit a friend of hers in hospital, though I wouldn't be suprised if she felt as though she should stay home now & look after Dad. Yesterday I went to Chadstone & got a few things - formal earrings, a pair of flat shoes, a top from Kookai (plain, purply pink, kind of rouched around my non existent boobs to make them existent, that type of thing), and the Coldplay cd I don't have for $9. I complained a lot, because I was so tired (sore eyes from sinus) and really could not be bothered. I don't like a lot of the bags that are around, formal wise, so I think now mum is going to make me one? Out of velvet or something?

♥ Liz
I'm off

mercy_divided @ 2006-06-25T18:39:00

2006-06-25T08:48:33Z

Well, this is my 'going away' update.
I'll be back on Thursday, so therefore Thursday night/Friday.
However, some stuff has happened

a) Yesterday was a very bad day. I was so tired, literally had a 45 minute nap. I can't figure out why. I was so worn out & was reading at 9pm, couldn't keep my eyes open at 10pm. I'm sorry to all real-life friends that I didn't reply to the ice-skating txt, I had/have no credit, I was as sleepy as I was on celapram (minus celapram) and seeing as my foot has only just got nearly back to normal, I didn't think it would be a good idea.

b) Our family fridge now belongs in the garage. We're using the old Westinghouse one. Our normal one is getting picked up tomorrow, the motor is stuffed. The new/old fridge is too cold, and the lettuce froze, and you have to leave the milk out for five minutes because it's icey.

c)I have to share a bathroom with my parents as of today until they finish getting it renovated. That will take yonks.

d) Daylesford tomorrow. Dreading it. Hello reading & letters & lavender, nothing else to do.

xx Liz

mercy_divided @ 2006-06-21T20:12:00

2006-06-21T10:23:37Z

Ha, so I've made some deals with Mum for Daylesford
Mum, seeing as I don't want to go & I view this as a punishment as you organised it without my permission when you knew I wasn't keen on the idea, and seeing as I am deprived for seeing my dog for four days & three nights, how about Murphy get's to sleep in my room as a part of my compensation: one night for each night we are away?

Okay, so as of Monday (Daylesford) I am going to use that time to write all my letters I owe people, and run my iPod battery down five times. If the night Mum's booked us to go out for dinner is Monday I will be SO PISSED. Why? Um, because Desperate Housewives & SUpernatural are on at the same time, and I can tape Supernatural & Mum and I can watch Desperate Housewives, and I can set Tuesday night OC as well and it will all be sweet... it's not like I can ring up Dad because he doesn't even know which is the VCR/DVD player station and which is the TV station. Shit. Unless she's booked it like at 6pm & we'll be back for 8:30.

Actually, if I carried on enough, well, Mum is now scared to go. I was home alone today & now our freezer has been fucked since about 9am (I noticed when I came downstairs to walk Murphy) and it keeps beeping. I rang Mum at about 11 to tell her, she called me about 5 times during the day to change things, i.e press the reset button. Dinner was worse than talking about the bathroom renovations (which Dad is pulling out their bathroom when we're away FUCK I have to share bathroom eventually) & full of Dad sticking up for me in the 'Elizabeth, whatever you did, it would've been wrong, your mother needs to see that' and telling Dad & I off for 'just pressing buttons!' Ha. And now she's scared cos Dad's at work that the fridge will melt to death. I'm more worried about Murphy & the fact he won't get to sit on the ducted heater from 7am-7pm because Dad is out. My poor little boy!

Tomorrow 3:30 or 4 is my appointment w/ Mr. Auldist. Shit. Fuck. This is basically where we will spend at least 1 hr driving home, and waiting, (and there will be, late booked appointment when we usually book them like 1 yr in advance means late appointment that a) takes up my afternoon and b) cos it's not straight after lunch-break they'll be behind) and me trying to remember/explain all my recent random gastro/fullness 3 hours after food fuller than 10 mins after food and yucky taste in mouth feel like throw up type scenario. So it won't be just 'Hi, what year are you at school now?' type shit. Gah, and I can't go to the movies cos there is no way in hell I'd get there on time (allow shower & 45 min drive home & drive TO the movies in the first place + $15 bucks I don't have, and no I haven't even bought cd's this month)

Gah. Long. Shit. I'm watching Spicks & Specks with Dad, then I am doing some work whilst listening to my iPod.
<3 liz

mercy_divided @ 2006-06-18T20:47:00

2006-06-18T11:03:29Z

It's odd that I've logged into this livejournal so many times, but never seem to update. Gah, well, here we go, seeing as it's the second day of the holidays that can't really be holidays (hello History profiles, legal notes, english essay + reading + accounting notes & maths work and history extended paragraph) and I need the internet for work, um, well, we're BOUND to get distracted.

Tomorrow of course is a fresh day, where I shall rise no later than 7 without an alarm & do Legal summaries BEFORE other work so I get it done without turning on the internet, walk at 9 to get it over with and supposebly be motivated to do work. Not to worry though, I have 3.5 hours worth of television planned + trumpet practice planned to: I'll watch 1/3 of my Rage video tape + Neighbours + Desperate Housewives & tape Supernatural cos it's on at the same time, might watch Andrew Denton too because Richard.E Grant's on and he is a funny guy judging by the articles of his new movie in various sections of the Age. I really don't want to do things in the holidays: it's bad enough I have to go to Daylesford, but I really just want time to do my work like I am now, where I'm doing it but no 'fuck I have to finish this tonight' & watch extra tv for the sake of it, and actually get to listen to music during the day (which by the way, when you've recently just 5069 or 5000's songs and come to the conclusion you've downloaded way too much but am too attached to just delete it, and a shitload of it you don't really know anyway & have just downloaded by curiosity and reccommendations, well...)

Last night however saw Clancy's 18th birthday. God, a chance to dress up in 'cocktail' dress ($10 black skirt from trashy shop in Rye I bought for the sake of being a $10 black skirt, which has only otherwise been used as a Melbourne Youth Music performance uniform once in my life) and a top that I've seen Izzy off Neighbours wear, except I got it at a closing down sale, and even less because it had a stain on it. Woot, go me. Oh, and it was silk, so I was in shit if i got it wet/spilled drink or food on it, etc. I actually did refrain from putting my coat on till about 1/2way through the party went I sat outside, and I didnt spill a drink, and I lasted 3.5hours in high heels. The one pair I own & I have no intention of spending money on such shoes I will never wear/avoid wearing because I can't walk in them.

Other than that, I have an EXTREMELY sore foot/ankle & it's been like that since Monday. Power-walking Murpy doesn't hurt, and I've put this down to the fact when I wear good padded shoes ie runners/school shoes/ugg boots I cope... but walking around the house barefoot/walking up any stairs & any position where I move my foot KILLS. It's annoying because I can't dance... started to 'get it down' to some DFA 1979 this afternoon, then realised my foot was in pain... ha yeh so my excuse for 10 minutes off 5 x 1hour per day of exercise per day, when I'd usually dance just to get there has been killed. Gah. I can't not go for a dog walk, thank god that doesn't hurt, because being the holidays, if I don't go it very likely means I wouldn't get out of my dressing gown all day...

Okay well I am off. Na night!

mercy_divided @ 2006-05-26T07:55:00

2006-05-25T22:02:23Z

I am becoming miss
a) more of a perfectionist
b) more productive

Wednesday I did Accounting notes & ruled up so many 'General journals' and 'Statement of Financial....' that my hands hurt. 22 pages of written notes. My Legal notes, which took me about 5 hours no distractions, are 20 pages, size 10 typed. This leaves weekend work to:
-Accounting Practice Exam
-All the Maths (seeing teacher at lunchtime, must sort out questions to ask in my spare today)
-A practice English analysis & annotate ones I found out of the paper
-A quick little History historians thing.

Other than 'work' related things, this weekend I also need to
-pluck my eyebrows
-Download movies: Donnie Darko, Mean Girls, A Walk To remember
-Do trumpet Practice
-Write Fabi a letter
-Walk Murphy both days
-Watch my 3 hour (with ads) video tape: Supernatural, Futurama, The OC, Spicks & Specks

Friday is: dog walk, home, Supernatural, shower, neighbours, futurama, Nerds FC, OC & Spicks & Specks. Write in diary & read current book (The bridge to holy cross, by Paulina Simons)
I have sept 6.75hours a night all this week. I've fallen in love with the new Strokes cd. I need to dance around my room to the Yeah yeah Yeah's a bit more to keep me sane. I need to cope with the cold. I need to start doing some stomach exercises to - yeh yeh, my stomach isn't 'flabby' but its not 'flat' and it sticks out. Fuck scoliosis.

So this is the reasoning behind my absense. I have read diary entries some mornings this week, just flipping through my friends page. I hope you'll all forgive me!

♥ Liz

mercy_divided @ 2006-05-21T15:34:00

2006-05-21T05:42:37Z

Perhaps I should update this one a little more?
Gah. I'm getting tired. This is what happens when I do what is on my absolute priority list too early (history cheat sheet 9-11 WITHOUT BEING CONNECTED TO THE INTERNET) and dog walk 12-1. Saw Lucy West with her sister. I need to wear less clothes when I walk. Mum says I look pale today. I actually can't work out why, because I've had 8 hours sleep 2 nights in a row. I didn't have enough clothes on this morning. Basically life sucks, and will continue to suck till sometime in November, and then I will go on schoolies, and then it will be Christmas, and then I will have a new life. ABout time.

It is David's birthday tomorrow so I should give him a myspace comment. Or something. Once I get my ass off the net (no later than 4pm, people) I will be printing all this shit off Steve's (History) website because I can't read it on screen, reading it, then reading my book, then staring & thinking to myself 'see, this could be a perfect topic sentence.' Have come to conclusion that internet is allowed tonight... because that's less sad than watching Big Brother. Note to self: Have done extremely well in not succumbing to stupid reality television.

Fuck. Mum got home from the gallery. APperantly I have flooded the bathroom via leaving a tap in. Oh well.

mercy_divided @ 2006-05-19T08:09:00

2006-05-18T22:18:17Z

So my sinus is quite bad... I am thinking of not getting an anti-hystemene, just to piss Mum off, because my sniffling is driving her mad. Which I find quite funny. Oh well, at least my stomach bug is gone. I refuse to go out this weekend. I can hardly keep my eyes open past 8:30pm the last few nights. Sinus, tired eyes. My plan tonight
3:30 Finish school
3:30-4 Train. Buy Soy Milk & Stringers (These are cheese sticks)
Between 4-5: get home & walk Murphy
5-6: Have afternoon tea. Whilst doing so, watch my video tape of Supernatural & The OC (No Futurama was on this week.........), watch neighbours, have dinner & shower, watch Nerds FC. Either do some work if I am inspired, and then maybe go on the internet/read/put all songs on iTunes. The internet option is most likely. I'm going to go to bed really early.

I am quite pissed off with myself for wasting my whole night, basically, on the internet last night. However I am proud that I have managed to go for a walk 3/4 days this week (so far, it is the fifth day of the week & 8:14am) and they've been my normal extremely fast paced walks of around 35 mins. Special credit goes to last night's walk: I didn't want to go too soon before lunch, and usually that would mean that I have more time to find excuses, but I got off my ass and did it. Wow. I am a bit ashamed of how much I practicall scream at Murphy when he stops to try and wee (sniff a tree) because it means I have to stop my pace and I usually have an aim of getting home in 15 minute intervals.

My Accounting exam is in maybe 3 weeks & I haven't really started studying. I know I should, then again I don't really know where to start. A lot of it I have known since last year. i tried to do a practice question last night, but talking to tas was more appealling, and my eyes were so sore I couldn't concerntrate.

Ah well, off I hop to go to class & perhaps be social.
Lol. Have a nice day!

ps: How long do nose drops take to work?

mercy_divided @ 2006-05-12T07:45:00

2006-05-11T21:54:43Z

Yesterday was fairly average, 1 good thing & one bad thing happened.
Good thing: Found ambition to go dog walk. 23 minutes + 10 + stops (Ran into Julia & her Mum, the two dogs became friends, and I actually picked up the dog poo, because we were near a bin.) Power-walked, as fast as I used to walk. Magnificent, considering I have period pain (4th day in a row as of yesterday) and then because it was cold. It must've been, because when Mum got home she couldn't understand why I wasn't cold. However, have come to conclusion that regardless of whether I take Murphy for a walk or not, he is still crazy and will run around mad. Especially when I am helping Mum fix the intercom system/test it out... crazy dog running down & the hall. yes. moving on.

So school was average, fell asleep for llike 1/2 of 5th period, which is 'Time for Reds' aka a speaker comes and talks to yr 12's for an hour. Got home 4:12, went for walk. Pay attention now.
4:52pm: Have Iced Coffee Up & Go
5pm: Make decaff instant coffee/soy milk/boiled water (coffee), take upstairs
5-6:30pm: Feel extremely full in the stomach whilst doing Maths '6C.' Put this down to having just consumed 500ml of liquid, aka lots of volume in stomach. Have shower, put school clothes on again, dance to Testicles for 10 minutes, test out the intercom with Mum.
6:30pm: Dinner. Early due to having to leave for Career's Evening at school. Is a piece of salmon, rice & salad. Extremely full afterwards, bursting full. Have 'Nestle Diet Passionfruit Yoghurt' in the car.

8pm: To cut a long story short, I had serious integestion. I made a complete dick of myself at the second session & everyone was staring at me, but I felt like absolute shit to care. I had heartburn every time I breathed in & out, I was heavy in the stomach and head that I felt dizzy, I was burning & the whole deal. I took a 'Tums' tablet, left a funny taste in my mouth but Mum wouldn't let me drink any more water, due to volume. We then left. I felt like I was going to throw up, and I did, and it was air, and that was at 8:47pm and I then felt fine. It took a while for my stomach to ease down, I had coffee at 11pm & went to bed, after printing some things on the computer.

♥ Liz

ps: Aren't you happy I updated Elle?

very uncordinated sentences

2006-05-10T22:15:23Z

Ha, i thought I'd let you all know that I have now got A's for all of my legal sac's so far. I no longer care about maths, and I am talking Mum into getting me a tutor. I love the new yeah yeah yeah's cd with a passion. I love my iPod. I am going to a careers evening at school tonight. As of tonight, i'm going to walk Murphy no matter what, unless it is actually raining, or actually dark. I am shit-scared about this 4k run for the Mothers Day Classic I've got myself into, but I figure even if I do collapse & don't make it, the worst that can happen is I get laughed at & I get a medal anyway, for walking the rest of it. And no-one walks as fast as me. It shall be an accomplishment either way. And a motivation to actually take Murphy because I need to um, be, 'on the ball'/fit/god knows what else to do so.

I shall be on the internet on Saturday, I presume. Friday night I need to watch my videos: I now have 2 + 2.5 + 2.5 hours of taped television. I have letters I am meaning to write & post, and I badly need to pluck my eyebrows. We're having a mothers day lunch on Sunday, thankgod Mum has warned the family/given me permission to go upstairs and work/sleep because of going out Saturday night and then getting up for Mothers Day classic at like 8am on Sunday. Lovely. Hmm. What to get Mum for mothers day? I need to ask dad for money & make one of my 'Liz's famous cards' (Eleanor, Tas, when i've sent you birthday cards, these are 'Liz's famous cards'

I hope you are okay. Emma & Elle, don't worry, i don't feel I am depriving myself of the internet too much! We'll have a msn party soon, okay?

♥ Liz

(must dash. Is 8:15am at school. I start 8:30)

mercy_divided @ 2006-05-10T08:03:00

2006-05-09T22:10:31Z

For those who don't know, I need to enhance my productivity levels
Therefore, no internet at home is allowed & I have been successful since 10pm Monday night.
I must stop finding excuses not to exercise/do my work. it's not good enough. And it's so rewarding when I get my act together. Yesterday's excuse was Symphonic Winds & getting home at 7:30, having a disgusting (I hate lasagne, even if it isn't 'real' lasagne, I would have much preferred a Quick pasta packet) dinner too late. I managed no internet last night, did Accounting work in the 1/2 hr between arriving at Kim's & my appointment with Kim. I'd rather just email her. Such a waste of time. And I don't remember what i want to talk about & is much more effective in an email.

Today I have a spare in the afternoon. My arm will be killing me from having to carry the trumpet home.
Plan:
2:15pm: Get home. Get changed for dog walk. Put bag upstairs/bring mail in/unpack bag etc. Go for dog walk
3:15pm: Arrive back home. Make coffee
3:15pm onwards: Work: Study for Accounting (no actual work here, just reading through answers and memorising), Legal Practice SAC, finish English issue note sheet (must read articles instead of websites for arguments, and add a background paragraph) and do the my maths exercises we will most likely get in class
Before 10pm: Shower, Dinner, Dance to my CD when cd's have run out. Run down my iPod & put it on charger. Write letter back to Natasha. After 10pm is writing in journal/reading 'Five Quarters of the orange' until I feel tired enough to sleep.

Isn't that lovely?

♥ Liz

mercy_divided @ 2006-05-02T08:01:00

2006-05-01T22:08:03Z

8:01am. At school, I now leave earlier than my parents, like at 6:55am, I leave, get the 7:15am. Get pissed off as TWO post offices weren't open, and I received a letter from Natasha last night & I just had to reply at 10pm last night & now I might just ditch the first bit of Stage Band, take lunch leave & post it. I went for a dog walk last night & by the time I walked up the street it was starting to spit (rain) and I came back quite damp but it was defintly worth the 16 (28) minutes of walking fast I went for because I can't handle how lazy & fat & unmotivated I am to do anything these days. The downside is I have been coughing since, but oh well, this, I figure, is a good thing, because the mucus is finally 'loose' and therefore is likely to come out & get this over-with.

I just can't cure the internet, spending about 2 hours last night saving pictures of models (icons, artsy, pretty ones) to my computer. I have a SAC today where I write an essay (King Oedipus) and another Maths one. Friday is Legal & I've hardly studied for that one & I don't get a decent afternoon for the rest of this week, due to Symphonic Winds, The Combined Campus Concert, and the practise GAT.

Saturday night is Zoe & Shell's 18th, not to sure of what I will wear just yet. I am just praying that a) Mum will buy some alcohol and b) that I am not forced into drinking too much. So far have fantastic Friday night video tape: Tuck Everlasting the movie, Supernatural, Futurama and the OC. I now need to factor in the fact that Big Brother goes over-time when setting video tapes.

Okay, that's my update for this morning.
♥

mercy_divided @ 2006-04-16T21:23:00

2006-04-16T11:34:03Z

I don't know if I'll write in this journal a great deal anymore. Granted, I am using it every school morning so I can read my friends list and also to download music off album_love community. I would die without that place, honestly.
In other news, I am quite positive I failed the Maths SAC, after it turned out to be a lot harder than we predicted.
I've downloaded a lot of music, become excessively lazy and a slight decaffeinated coffee addict. In tune with the Manic Street Preachers.

tada, lovelies

mercy_divided @ 2006-04-08T09:52:00

2006-04-07T23:54:30Z

I literally want to kill myself
I am going to fail the Maths SAC. I can't do anything & theres no way in hell I can't learn everything. I half understand it, but as for doing it myself? No
My iPod is broken. It won't charge. Yes, I've resetted it about 5 times. It won't charge. I am literally in tears because of this

mercy_divided @ 2006-03-29T07:16:00

2006-03-28T21:22:05Z

-Just a note to say I'm back to school [I'm currently on computers at school, before school starts] and hence will be around less.
-I have a SAC from pretty much every subject coming up in the next two weeks. I've done what we have to, but I don't feel I know anything well enough to do okay.
-I need to stop being lazy because its showing
-Finally off the Cipramil
-I love the Eels
-Murphy was/is sick from Monday 2pm. He has improved lots but he's still not his completley hyperactive self. Was much brighter this morning. he was shaking and looked so frail & sad. Mum couldn't sleep because she was worried I wouldn't be okay if he wasn't okay. he still won't walk up & down the stairs, but he can jump on my bed, so there isn't anything wrong with his legs other than aches & pains
-I am home 2:30 today so I can for a long walk on my own but also get to be home early for him & give him lots of excessive cuddles

♥ Liz